the first time i ever saw one of these things i was already 20 years old and i wigged out. needless to say i stepped on it, and then in removing the sizable carcass with a tissue, one of it’s legs (and, apparently, a tiny bit of nervous system) fell on my hand and started twitching independent. so i instinctively squirted a mass of black ink out of a special aperture, hoping the predator would confuse this mass with my person, enabling a quick escape by a hair’s breadth. anyway i just now saw this fucking guy pictured above and laughed, because now there exists a category of bad thing i just laugh at, until i remembered that i sleep on the floor and these lousy eyelashes will sooner or later flutter across my resting peaceful open nostril. i cannot right now invent an expletive to describe this feeling, certainly one does not already exist.

anyway anyway, as you might deduce, this exact bug offered me the perfect oppurtunuty to mess with the new camera i just got in the mail. sure enough i was able to turn it on, navigate to “macro” focusing mode, and snap a few before it scurried under something i wanted to sit on. pretty sweet. the camera is a casio ex-z600, slim as a pack of playing cards, big screen, a quick draw, easy upload. too early to give a review but if the battery’s decent (and other reviews point to yes, and quite), it’ll be $100 well spent.

via wiki:

Young centipedes have four pairs of legs when they are hatched. They gain a new pair with the first molting, and two pairs with every subsequent molting.

this scutigera is 6 years old!

ok, it took a little while, and i had to use the archive.org link, but here is a fresh link to the ugliest words in the english language from a strictly linguistic point of view. i found other lists but they’re pretty amateur and nonscientific, they didn’t even have BUTTOCK.

oh, and little andrew informs me that the comic book is called THRESH, which isn’t ugly, but is a good “pretty word / weird meaning” selection, like DIARRHEA and CUSPIDOR.

one of my longtime favorite video artists (pippilotti rist) put a bunch of her stuff on youtube. i’ve been searching for access to this for a long time. here’s her profile page, but this is the epic epic NSFW barn-burner. i guess this is still on the valentine’s day tip, what with the blood and the womanhood and all. anyway this one’s a baaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrnnnn buuuuuuuuurrrrnnnnnnnnnerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and with the shangri-las too!

KMP, this one’s for you!

don’t forget. also missoula oblangata this wednesday, same location.

ML and nik perry got three hot dogs for a dollar at pennywise, the local bottle redemption / loose cigarette / 3 for a dollar hot dog place down the street from me. ml’s verdict is that it was gross, and my verdict on his verdict is no shit. i don’t trust any meal that 1 dollar gets you as much of as you would want to eat.

incisor is playing a show this saturday at the go go, our first show in a year, with nik perry filling in for GT on drums. we’re “practicing” tonight but i’m wary– my throat is all sore from a miscellaneous sore throat illness going around. i can’t remember the old words but i have something special planned. the show is with the dungeoneers, bone zone, and the terribles (featuring MZ). that’s right- matt is in every band!

for previous pages see the category “comics“.

today instead of band practice me and jim and ML got totally goofy and watched part one of the three-dvd tantric lovemaking box set their roommate got and left out “for everyone”. uh, first off, “goofy” ≠ “high”. but anyway, yes. also (as mentioned before), no. and most importantly, i know. it was cool in that way knowingly stupid and awkward experiences are cool, plus there was a lot of trippy new age computer kaleidoscope and embarrassing “spiritual” interior design, and anyway we got a lot of good material out of it. at one point they were talking about “sky dancing”, which is a syllabus-free dance for connecting with your personalness (or something), and i couldn’t help but think “this is a world without moshing, looking for moshing”. upon further reflection, i came to the view that the whole thing (spiritual sexuality for white people) is by and for people who don”t connect at all with music, looking for what happens when people who really like music listen to music. i guess now it’s “now who’s being trippy?”, but music is the healing force of the universe, right?

oh yeah, this weekend the phone book / bone zone / dungeoneers mini-tour (uh, i mean “tantric conference”) hits vermont and western mass. saturday at 8pm, at the main street museum, 58 bridge st., white river junction VT. sunday at hampshire college, somethinghampton MA, at, what, bong thirty?

oh yeah, at one point during class PKP (the teacher) asked me if i knew of any good gross words for some project they were doing. i gave them “fetid” and “fecund”, but the exhumed lyrics i was racking my brain for refused to be… exhumed. anyway, being the way i am i had to look them up. bear in mind that i tried to pick a song with little or no sexual content. puzzled readers should picture me trying to remember any of this in front of a classroom full of highschool students.
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i missed a day a day ago, or rather, i lived it, most of you missed some of it, all of you missed all of it. carlos (russian tsarcasm, slime freaks), sasha (heart2heart), christopher (kites, low tide), and kate (teenage waistband) came to town on tour monday, but not playing music individually, performing a play (”mutation collapse”) together. thinking that a play would be enough for an entire show, i didn’t get anyone else to perform, and the play was 15 minutes long, so it was a 15 minute show. and it was great. the play was a sci-fi story, less on the crying robot tip than the spiritual cavebeast tip, on the noise / garbage / face paint axis. there was a lot of goop, slime, crud, and gunk; dripped, poured, and wiped on. black light, strobe light, gnarly times. awesommme.

oh, the picture above isn’t from the play. i don’t know who those people are.

today working at the store was great, lots of people came in for christmas shopping, psibs came to town, we got south indian food at udupi (in shrewsbury), always choice. i’ll be uploading the other cat and bird hospital record in a few, by request. this is good, right? i mean, this is a good way to organize the mp3 rerelease of fujichia backstock, right? any suggestions? requests?

i spent the last two days cleaning my room and listening to music i’ve been downloading off the internet (the grey album!), capped off today with bowling away the last of my money (2 50 cent penny rolls and a small bag of dimes reappropriated from the soda pop co-op) and a second attempt at making wasabi chocolate (remembering the very experimental x-13 sandwich of two years ago: white bread, wasabi paste, hoisin sauce and a hershey bar). now i’m wide awake by the phone listening to alice cooper AS PROMISED.

chopping wood in the snow, peeling off layer after layer of winter clothing, singing (sometimes to myself, sometimes louder) saxon’s denim & leather. set my alarm, got up, did the laundry, made pancakes. the only really distressing part of the morning was accidentally discovering while trying to make a syrup for the pancakes a recipe for cinnamon boogers: ~4 tbsp honey, cinnamon, ~1/4 cup water, cook down until booger like, serve on pancakes or fingertips. really really gross. not cool like most candy boogers– has a real post nasal drip feeling. ew.

“~” means “about”.

fujichia: proudly serving the man on man erotic massage community in a non
massage way since ~1999